Burning Pumpkin of Death! 

The Domino Effect

I know that I’ve run this past several of my friends in the last month or so, and so if you don’t feel like reading about it after talking about it with me, then you can feel free to disregard this post. After all, I’m still convinced no one reads this but me and so I’m not entirely offended if you choose not to.

In any case, I think the theory bears merit. The domino effect occurs in any group of friends or relatives and comes in three variations: breakups, marriage, and babies. What I’ve noticed is that when one couple does one of those three things, the other people in their social circle start thinking about their own relationship in that context.

For example, my friend was the first one to get engaged and the first one to get married in several social groups. (Most people belong to more than one, so that shouldn’t sound odd.) She was certainly the first one in our group. In any case, her getting engaged caused me to wonder where my relationship was going at the time and start pushing for engagement, and I’m sure started pushing other girls in her groups to start pushing for the same. And then after she got married, at least 3 other couples announced their engagement/wedding date soon afterward, and now that social group is made up of mainly married couples.

However, in my social group, my other good friend broke up with her long-term boyfriend, and this started a chain of breakups throughout the group, including my own and my roommate’s – who didn’t even know her that well. Now, my roommate is back together with her boyfriend, but she was still involved in the chain in the first place, and her domino actually fell before mine did.

This effect isn’t something completely random – it’s the result of what peer pressure does when you’re in any social group. What one person does, no matter how isolated it may seem to her, affects anyone else within her social sphere. People as a whole are used to the status quo, so the thought of change makes everyone else evaluate whether they’re satisfied in their own situations. Even if the couple doesn’t break up, get married, or have a baby the domino effect has still made some sort of impact just because of the analysis.

If anyone else has a different perspective on this, I’d be glad to hear it. But I’m going to go back to studying now and stop trying to analyze everyone else’s behavior. ;)

You can't prosecute me for committing suicide. I'm already dead. Oh what we learn in school..

First let us have a moment of silence in the memory of all who died on 9/11/01. And remember we are not the only country to undergo terrorism....some countries go through it every day. We need to think about that and know we are not alone.

Okay so it’s official. I’m a bitch. I’ve come to terms with it, and realize that there’s not much I can really do to change other people’s opinions of me other than to change myself. But, you know what? I like who I am. And obviously, there are enough positive aspects to my personality to keep my boyfriend and my friends around, so I must not be too entirely horrible. Additionally, I think it’s awesome my friends feel they can be completely honest with me, no matter what the criticism is. So I’m not a nice person (well not entirely.) Who is a completely nice person? The people who seem like they could never be mean in their entire lives are simply acting, and repressing any negative emotions they may have. Remember, the abusers are the ones who tend to be the most charming. Therefore, I’m fine just the way I am. Though I’m sure no one is contending that I need major change, I just want to reassure myself that I am indeed a good and valuable person, even if I tend to say a couple of harsh things. Or a hundred.

Anyway, on with it on with it (no one wants to hear you gripe..)

So I’m in family law at the moment (mainly goofing off with my newly found friend Ashley) and lo and behold, who does the professor mention in the middle of lecture?? That’s right – State Senator Friend. And yes, those of you who read this blog and know generally about me know to whom he is related. I think that’s hilarious – I don’t think I’ve ever been in a class where one of my friend’s (haha no pun intended) relatives was actually mentioned. It’s fabulous.

Also, I’m supposed to support Miss Ashley’s argument regarding abortion, and although I haven’t read it yet – and I’m assuming it’s pro-choice, I support it!! I’m a fan! Not of abortion per se, but of women’s rights to privacy and to choose what she does with her own body. I’m not even sure the father should have the right to choose, because what if both of them want different things? Then if she had the abortion, he would have the right to sue…taking away her right to choose in the first place. And what if he didn’t want the baby? There’s a case where the father said he didn’t want her to have the baby but she had it anyway, and thus didn’t think he should pay child support. Well, you know what? (completely not a legal argument…) he was there when conception occurred. Just because it may not be his choice does not rid him of responsibility. In any case, it’s not entirely logical. Maybe later I’ll think of a legal argument that will stun all of you – but I’ll concentrate on that after I move this weekend.

Speaking of which, I’m extremely excited about this new endeavor – I haven’t moved in 2 years! And I have a roommate! Score! I just can’t wait to get out of my apartment with the drug lords and the breaking in cars situation, blah blah blah. Plus, hopefully I’ll get cable – which would just make my day.

Alright, I’m going to pay attention to Alfalfa – no, not the guy in front of me, but the guy teaching the class. :)

What? No headline? You can't have a blog without a headline!!

Alright! So one week of school is officially finished. Here's my schedule overview for this fall - 12 hours of classes, 25 hrs of work, and Women's Law Caucus (I'm the events coordinator now.) I'm not quite sure how I'm going to have the time to just do that, much less do that and get in my required social time...as I'm already beginning to see. It's alright, if you all can bear with me for about 2 more years I may actually have time to see you and do something slightly more fun than a 2 hour visit. After all, I've already known most of you for about half a decade if not more, so I think 2 more years isn't bad, is it? Of course by then, everyone will be married or something and I won't...so I think I'll move to California.

California's a good place - as long as it doesn't break off the country and float into the ocean.

Okay, so I can't think of anything witty or sardonic to say today (what's wrong with you Michelle? Are you dead?) so I think I may go ahead and find a picture. But before that, I will say something that will shock everyone into their grave...

I will beat EVERYONE in my fantasy football league!!!!

That's right, I said it!! FOOTBALL!! Where's my rocker, you're asking??? Well, (a) I've been informed that I have to learn about the game before I'm allowed to go to see the Bengals play (and I REALLY Want to see a professional football game...seriously just cause)and (b) one of my guy friends invited me to play in their league since he was leaving the firm and it would be a good way to keep in touch.

For the last couple of weeks it's just been in the back of my mind, nothing important - just mess around with it every once in a while once the draft goes...I didn't even really pick my own players...but then Ed (study partner guy) showed me his excel sheet for his fantasy football team. And I want it. And I'm going to get it. He's won in his league...thus if I manage to get mine down like that, I should have a good chance of winning.....we all know how dangerous this is for me kids. It's just bad.

In any case, I would LOVE it if I won because *1* I never really liked football and *2* I'm one of those typical girls that knows nothing about it. So how pissed would every other guy be if I beat the crap out of them?? HA!!!!

Random Comment #45 Does anyone know of a place in Cincy where you can get belly dancing lessons that aren't on Monday nights??

Me love you long time! -- Really? Sure doesn't seem like it, oh evil chinese buffet

Tip of the day:
Don't eat at any chinese buffet which calls itself the "Best Value in Town." You will end up sweating beads and sitting/laying on the couch for the rest of the night just waiting to die. And it's not good for a hangover.

Yeah yeah so the hangover was gone by about 11 this morning, but all I'm saying is English muffins and lox (cream cheese and salmon) simply do nothing for curing the nausea which comes with mixing tequila and rum. It was a good idea at the time! (Do you have a flag?)

Anyway, for a comment that should make everyone involved highly uncomfortable (and perhaps risk running off my boyfriend - which could be happening regardless) - the situations of all my friends as compared to mine completely irk me. Alright, so Babcia tells me that I shouldn't compare other people's situations, love or otherwise to my own since I am usually in completely different circumstances in the first place, which is certainly true with my love life.

What brings this up? The fact that it seems that everyone I know is in a seriously committed, mature relationship and I am not. Now, this is not to say that we are (a) not committed, or (b) not mature, but all of my friends seem to be either living together or married, save a couple. All his friends are either in our status (I kinda assume, as I never hang out with his friends...) or single.

Okay, yeah, so this can be a little frustrating for a girl, especially one who has been craving stability for at least a year. But, our situation is a tad different than everyone else's, mainly in these two aspects: (1) We're in a long distance relationship of a whopping 5 hours (he's in MI) and (2) Both of us are still in school. In those respective states. So while I crave stability, I'm not even in the state to actually have that in the first place - so I know it's going to be at least 2 years no matter who I'm with. And while I'm glad others are happy getting married in the middle of school, I know I just can't do that.

I suppose I should minimize the risk of being told "Uhh Hey Michelle. I've had a good time with you, but I just don't think we should see each other because you're SCARY" by making a disclaimer: I'm not interested in marriage at this time. I'm just jealous that others have seemed to further (is that the word?) their lives in ways that I cannot. Suffice it to say that I feel that I've plateaued at being a perma-student who earns a mere $10/hr and that I will die alone, eaten by wild dogs.

Apparently a thing that comes with a mild case of food poisoning is a serious case of verbal diarrhea. Let's hope no one reads this.