And for everyone's viewing pleasure....me at my worst during the month that was Halloween. What was that??? And Bitches, stop looking at me funny! You're wearing a plastic vest! Haha
Monday, November 20, 2006
Confidence is overrated? What?
Confidence - Garbage
You’re confident
So confident
You’re full of it
So full of it
You’re full of shit
Alright, so it’s taken me a while to say anything else, but I haven’t had anything useful to talk about. Until now. I have a question to pose for anyone who would like to answer it for me:
Why do we emphasize that confidence is necessary for your mental health, but when we see someone who is confident, we say they’re either (a) full of it or (b) full of themselves?
I really don’t understand this concept. I used to be told on a nearly daily basis that I didn’t have enough confidence in myself, or that I had low self-esteem and that I should work on that. And now, the opposite is occurring – suddenly I and other “confident” people I know are being told that we are either full of ourselves, arrogant, or we’re just trying to fool everyone. Apparently it’s good to aspire to confidence, but not actually to have confidence.
My theory is that people in this country are afraid to appear anything outside of ordinary or to know their own capabilities and be proud of them. And it’s not like people don’t know their own strengths and weaknesses (well I assume most of us do. I certainly know mine) but it’s like we’re afraid to say we’re proud of ourselves because we might hurt someone else’s feelings. What is this, the nation of egos? Everyone is exceptional in different areas, and you know what, I think it’s good to know what you’re good at and to be proud of them. Isn’t that what we ultimately aspire to be? Someone who you can look in the mirror and say – “Hey, I like you. You’re a cool chick/dude”?
As the cliché goes, you can’t get anyone else to love you until you love yourself.
The same goes with our puritanical view of love and romance – why are we so bent on getting married and settling down? I have plenty of friends (and sometimes including myself) who disappoint themselves because they haven’t gotten engaged or even necessarily found the right guy. And all of us are around the same age – about early to mid 20s. That’s pretty young in these modern times. But the need for that “one true love” seems to run rampant, and drive many people, mainly women, crazy because they feel like they do not have it. And I think that’s driven by our own insecurities within ourselves, and certainly isn’t helped by the sheer number of ideal romances that you see in the media. Not that I’m trying to put blame on something else. No one in our society would do that.
And besides wanting to get married, there still remains the view that sex as a whole is a bad thing unless you’re in a seriously committed relationship. I generally hold to that thought, but that’s just because I don’t think it should be that easy to get that intimate with me. Notice I said generally.
But I have heard the opposite from my foreign friend (haha I think it’s funny to call her that) – who says that we here are entirely too conservative in our views toward sex. Apparently where she grew up, it was considered a natural thing, and doing it shouldn’t necessarily be constrained just because you aren’t in love. I don’t know how I feel about that, but I can see where she’s coming from.
So I think that should cover me for another month or so. I’ll see you all after I have walked over the burning coals in my bare feet about 4 times – finals is friggin awesome. Yay caffeine!
You’re confident
So confident
You’re full of it
So full of it
You’re full of shit
Alright, so it’s taken me a while to say anything else, but I haven’t had anything useful to talk about. Until now. I have a question to pose for anyone who would like to answer it for me:
Why do we emphasize that confidence is necessary for your mental health, but when we see someone who is confident, we say they’re either (a) full of it or (b) full of themselves?
I really don’t understand this concept. I used to be told on a nearly daily basis that I didn’t have enough confidence in myself, or that I had low self-esteem and that I should work on that. And now, the opposite is occurring – suddenly I and other “confident” people I know are being told that we are either full of ourselves, arrogant, or we’re just trying to fool everyone. Apparently it’s good to aspire to confidence, but not actually to have confidence.
My theory is that people in this country are afraid to appear anything outside of ordinary or to know their own capabilities and be proud of them. And it’s not like people don’t know their own strengths and weaknesses (well I assume most of us do. I certainly know mine) but it’s like we’re afraid to say we’re proud of ourselves because we might hurt someone else’s feelings. What is this, the nation of egos? Everyone is exceptional in different areas, and you know what, I think it’s good to know what you’re good at and to be proud of them. Isn’t that what we ultimately aspire to be? Someone who you can look in the mirror and say – “Hey, I like you. You’re a cool chick/dude”?
As the cliché goes, you can’t get anyone else to love you until you love yourself.
The same goes with our puritanical view of love and romance – why are we so bent on getting married and settling down? I have plenty of friends (and sometimes including myself) who disappoint themselves because they haven’t gotten engaged or even necessarily found the right guy. And all of us are around the same age – about early to mid 20s. That’s pretty young in these modern times. But the need for that “one true love” seems to run rampant, and drive many people, mainly women, crazy because they feel like they do not have it. And I think that’s driven by our own insecurities within ourselves, and certainly isn’t helped by the sheer number of ideal romances that you see in the media. Not that I’m trying to put blame on something else. No one in our society would do that.
And besides wanting to get married, there still remains the view that sex as a whole is a bad thing unless you’re in a seriously committed relationship. I generally hold to that thought, but that’s just because I don’t think it should be that easy to get that intimate with me. Notice I said generally.
But I have heard the opposite from my foreign friend (haha I think it’s funny to call her that) – who says that we here are entirely too conservative in our views toward sex. Apparently where she grew up, it was considered a natural thing, and doing it shouldn’t necessarily be constrained just because you aren’t in love. I don’t know how I feel about that, but I can see where she’s coming from.
So I think that should cover me for another month or so. I’ll see you all after I have walked over the burning coals in my bare feet about 4 times – finals is friggin awesome. Yay caffeine!
Monday, October 23, 2006
Fight or Flight Syndrome
I’ve decided that I think I’m Carrie. I look at what’s going on around me and suddenly have a revelation about the underlying psychology behind the behavior when really it’s just an obvious pattern we all realize.
This week’s theory:
People have one of two responses to extreme stress. One is to ignore the event entirely, and the other is to immediately confront it – i.e., the fight or flight syndrome we all have when our adrenaline is rushing. And if you have a group of people experiencing the same stress, then the group will split off into those two sets of people. Finally, there ends up being a concentric circle pattern where those who “fight” end up dealing with the stress and attempting to handle it, and thus considered having the right to be there to make the decisions, and those who “fly” end up being left out and not considered to be strong enough to do the same.
Is this an extension of Darwin’s “survival of the fittest” argument? What I’ve noticed is that those who deny the issue and try to handle it on their own instead of cooperating with the “whole” end up being closed out of the circle. This occurs even in small families in dealing with a relative’s recovery. It kind of makes sense, but it also underestimates the people who run off – just because they do not have the compulsion to be at the center of the situation doesn’t mean they don’t have the ability to handle the stress. It’s just a different mindset.
Alright, I just had to get that off my chest and I should study now.
This week’s theory:
People have one of two responses to extreme stress. One is to ignore the event entirely, and the other is to immediately confront it – i.e., the fight or flight syndrome we all have when our adrenaline is rushing. And if you have a group of people experiencing the same stress, then the group will split off into those two sets of people. Finally, there ends up being a concentric circle pattern where those who “fight” end up dealing with the stress and attempting to handle it, and thus considered having the right to be there to make the decisions, and those who “fly” end up being left out and not considered to be strong enough to do the same.
Is this an extension of Darwin’s “survival of the fittest” argument? What I’ve noticed is that those who deny the issue and try to handle it on their own instead of cooperating with the “whole” end up being closed out of the circle. This occurs even in small families in dealing with a relative’s recovery. It kind of makes sense, but it also underestimates the people who run off – just because they do not have the compulsion to be at the center of the situation doesn’t mean they don’t have the ability to handle the stress. It’s just a different mindset.
Alright, I just had to get that off my chest and I should study now.
Thursday, October 12, 2006
The Domino Effect
I know that I’ve run this past several of my friends in the last month or so, and so if you don’t feel like reading about it after talking about it with me, then you can feel free to disregard this post. After all, I’m still convinced no one reads this but me and so I’m not entirely offended if you choose not to.
In any case, I think the theory bears merit. The domino effect occurs in any group of friends or relatives and comes in three variations: breakups, marriage, and babies. What I’ve noticed is that when one couple does one of those three things, the other people in their social circle start thinking about their own relationship in that context.
For example, my friend was the first one to get engaged and the first one to get married in several social groups. (Most people belong to more than one, so that shouldn’t sound odd.) She was certainly the first one in our group. In any case, her getting engaged caused me to wonder where my relationship was going at the time and start pushing for engagement, and I’m sure started pushing other girls in her groups to start pushing for the same. And then after she got married, at least 3 other couples announced their engagement/wedding date soon afterward, and now that social group is made up of mainly married couples.
However, in my social group, my other good friend broke up with her long-term boyfriend, and this started a chain of breakups throughout the group, including my own and my roommate’s – who didn’t even know her that well. Now, my roommate is back together with her boyfriend, but she was still involved in the chain in the first place, and her domino actually fell before mine did.
This effect isn’t something completely random – it’s the result of what peer pressure does when you’re in any social group. What one person does, no matter how isolated it may seem to her, affects anyone else within her social sphere. People as a whole are used to the status quo, so the thought of change makes everyone else evaluate whether they’re satisfied in their own situations. Even if the couple doesn’t break up, get married, or have a baby the domino effect has still made some sort of impact just because of the analysis.
If anyone else has a different perspective on this, I’d be glad to hear it. But I’m going to go back to studying now and stop trying to analyze everyone else’s behavior. ;)
In any case, I think the theory bears merit. The domino effect occurs in any group of friends or relatives and comes in three variations: breakups, marriage, and babies. What I’ve noticed is that when one couple does one of those three things, the other people in their social circle start thinking about their own relationship in that context.
For example, my friend was the first one to get engaged and the first one to get married in several social groups. (Most people belong to more than one, so that shouldn’t sound odd.) She was certainly the first one in our group. In any case, her getting engaged caused me to wonder where my relationship was going at the time and start pushing for engagement, and I’m sure started pushing other girls in her groups to start pushing for the same. And then after she got married, at least 3 other couples announced their engagement/wedding date soon afterward, and now that social group is made up of mainly married couples.
However, in my social group, my other good friend broke up with her long-term boyfriend, and this started a chain of breakups throughout the group, including my own and my roommate’s – who didn’t even know her that well. Now, my roommate is back together with her boyfriend, but she was still involved in the chain in the first place, and her domino actually fell before mine did.
This effect isn’t something completely random – it’s the result of what peer pressure does when you’re in any social group. What one person does, no matter how isolated it may seem to her, affects anyone else within her social sphere. People as a whole are used to the status quo, so the thought of change makes everyone else evaluate whether they’re satisfied in their own situations. Even if the couple doesn’t break up, get married, or have a baby the domino effect has still made some sort of impact just because of the analysis.
If anyone else has a different perspective on this, I’d be glad to hear it. But I’m going to go back to studying now and stop trying to analyze everyone else’s behavior. ;)
Monday, September 11, 2006
You can't prosecute me for committing suicide. I'm already dead. Oh what we learn in school..
First let us have a moment of silence in the memory of all who died on 9/11/01. And remember we are not the only country to undergo terrorism....some countries go through it every day. We need to think about that and know we are not alone.
Okay so it’s official. I’m a bitch. I’ve come to terms with it, and realize that there’s not much I can really do to change other people’s opinions of me other than to change myself. But, you know what? I like who I am. And obviously, there are enough positive aspects to my personality to keep my boyfriend and my friends around, so I must not be too entirely horrible. Additionally, I think it’s awesome my friends feel they can be completely honest with me, no matter what the criticism is. So I’m not a nice person (well not entirely.) Who is a completely nice person? The people who seem like they could never be mean in their entire lives are simply acting, and repressing any negative emotions they may have. Remember, the abusers are the ones who tend to be the most charming. Therefore, I’m fine just the way I am. Though I’m sure no one is contending that I need major change, I just want to reassure myself that I am indeed a good and valuable person, even if I tend to say a couple of harsh things. Or a hundred.
Anyway, on with it on with it (no one wants to hear you gripe..)
So I’m in family law at the moment (mainly goofing off with my newly found friend Ashley) and lo and behold, who does the professor mention in the middle of lecture?? That’s right – State Senator Friend. And yes, those of you who read this blog and know generally about me know to whom he is related. I think that’s hilarious – I don’t think I’ve ever been in a class where one of my friend’s (haha no pun intended) relatives was actually mentioned. It’s fabulous.
Also, I’m supposed to support Miss Ashley’s argument regarding abortion, and although I haven’t read it yet – and I’m assuming it’s pro-choice, I support it!! I’m a fan! Not of abortion per se, but of women’s rights to privacy and to choose what she does with her own body. I’m not even sure the father should have the right to choose, because what if both of them want different things? Then if she had the abortion, he would have the right to sue…taking away her right to choose in the first place. And what if he didn’t want the baby? There’s a case where the father said he didn’t want her to have the baby but she had it anyway, and thus didn’t think he should pay child support. Well, you know what? (completely not a legal argument…) he was there when conception occurred. Just because it may not be his choice does not rid him of responsibility. In any case, it’s not entirely logical. Maybe later I’ll think of a legal argument that will stun all of you – but I’ll concentrate on that after I move this weekend.
Speaking of which, I’m extremely excited about this new endeavor – I haven’t moved in 2 years! And I have a roommate! Score! I just can’t wait to get out of my apartment with the drug lords and the breaking in cars situation, blah blah blah. Plus, hopefully I’ll get cable – which would just make my day.
Alright, I’m going to pay attention to Alfalfa – no, not the guy in front of me, but the guy teaching the class. :)
Okay so it’s official. I’m a bitch. I’ve come to terms with it, and realize that there’s not much I can really do to change other people’s opinions of me other than to change myself. But, you know what? I like who I am. And obviously, there are enough positive aspects to my personality to keep my boyfriend and my friends around, so I must not be too entirely horrible. Additionally, I think it’s awesome my friends feel they can be completely honest with me, no matter what the criticism is. So I’m not a nice person (well not entirely.) Who is a completely nice person? The people who seem like they could never be mean in their entire lives are simply acting, and repressing any negative emotions they may have. Remember, the abusers are the ones who tend to be the most charming. Therefore, I’m fine just the way I am. Though I’m sure no one is contending that I need major change, I just want to reassure myself that I am indeed a good and valuable person, even if I tend to say a couple of harsh things. Or a hundred.
Anyway, on with it on with it (no one wants to hear you gripe..)
So I’m in family law at the moment (mainly goofing off with my newly found friend Ashley) and lo and behold, who does the professor mention in the middle of lecture?? That’s right – State Senator Friend. And yes, those of you who read this blog and know generally about me know to whom he is related. I think that’s hilarious – I don’t think I’ve ever been in a class where one of my friend’s (haha no pun intended) relatives was actually mentioned. It’s fabulous.
Also, I’m supposed to support Miss Ashley’s argument regarding abortion, and although I haven’t read it yet – and I’m assuming it’s pro-choice, I support it!! I’m a fan! Not of abortion per se, but of women’s rights to privacy and to choose what she does with her own body. I’m not even sure the father should have the right to choose, because what if both of them want different things? Then if she had the abortion, he would have the right to sue…taking away her right to choose in the first place. And what if he didn’t want the baby? There’s a case where the father said he didn’t want her to have the baby but she had it anyway, and thus didn’t think he should pay child support. Well, you know what? (completely not a legal argument…) he was there when conception occurred. Just because it may not be his choice does not rid him of responsibility. In any case, it’s not entirely logical. Maybe later I’ll think of a legal argument that will stun all of you – but I’ll concentrate on that after I move this weekend.
Speaking of which, I’m extremely excited about this new endeavor – I haven’t moved in 2 years! And I have a roommate! Score! I just can’t wait to get out of my apartment with the drug lords and the breaking in cars situation, blah blah blah. Plus, hopefully I’ll get cable – which would just make my day.
Alright, I’m going to pay attention to Alfalfa – no, not the guy in front of me, but the guy teaching the class. :)
Thursday, August 24, 2006
What? No headline? You can't have a blog without a headline!!
Alright! So one week of school is officially finished. Here's my schedule overview for this fall - 12 hours of classes, 25 hrs of work, and Women's Law Caucus (I'm the events coordinator now.) I'm not quite sure how I'm going to have the time to just do that, much less do that and get in my required social time...as I'm already beginning to see. It's alright, if you all can bear with me for about 2 more years I may actually have time to see you and do something slightly more fun than a 2 hour visit. After all, I've already known most of you for about half a decade if not more, so I think 2 more years isn't bad, is it? Of course by then, everyone will be married or something and I won't...so I think I'll move to California.
California's a good place - as long as it doesn't break off the country and float into the ocean.
Okay, so I can't think of anything witty or sardonic to say today (what's wrong with you Michelle? Are you dead?) so I think I may go ahead and find a picture. But before that, I will say something that will shock everyone into their grave...
That's right, I said it!! FOOTBALL!! Where's my rocker, you're asking??? Well, (a) I've been informed that I have to learn about the game before I'm allowed to go to see the Bengals play (and I REALLY Want to see a professional football game...seriously just cause)and (b) one of my guy friends invited me to play in their league since he was leaving the firm and it would be a good way to keep in touch.
For the last couple of weeks it's just been in the back of my mind, nothing important - just mess around with it every once in a while once the draft goes...I didn't even really pick my own players...but then Ed (study partner guy) showed me his excel sheet for his fantasy football team. And I want it. And I'm going to get it. He's won in his league...thus if I manage to get mine down like that, I should have a good chance of winning.....we all know how dangerous this is for me kids. It's just bad.
In any case, I would LOVE it if I won because *1* I never really liked football and *2* I'm one of those typical girls that knows nothing about it. So how pissed would every other guy be if I beat the crap out of them?? HA!!!!
Random Comment #45 Does anyone know of a place in Cincy where you can get belly dancing lessons that aren't on Monday nights??
California's a good place - as long as it doesn't break off the country and float into the ocean.
Okay, so I can't think of anything witty or sardonic to say today (what's wrong with you Michelle? Are you dead?) so I think I may go ahead and find a picture. But before that, I will say something that will shock everyone into their grave...
I will beat EVERYONE in my fantasy football league!!!!
That's right, I said it!! FOOTBALL!! Where's my rocker, you're asking??? Well, (a) I've been informed that I have to learn about the game before I'm allowed to go to see the Bengals play (and I REALLY Want to see a professional football game...seriously just cause)and (b) one of my guy friends invited me to play in their league since he was leaving the firm and it would be a good way to keep in touch.
For the last couple of weeks it's just been in the back of my mind, nothing important - just mess around with it every once in a while once the draft goes...I didn't even really pick my own players...but then Ed (study partner guy) showed me his excel sheet for his fantasy football team. And I want it. And I'm going to get it. He's won in his league...thus if I manage to get mine down like that, I should have a good chance of winning.....we all know how dangerous this is for me kids. It's just bad.
In any case, I would LOVE it if I won because *1* I never really liked football and *2* I'm one of those typical girls that knows nothing about it. So how pissed would every other guy be if I beat the crap out of them?? HA!!!!
Random Comment #45 Does anyone know of a place in Cincy where you can get belly dancing lessons that aren't on Monday nights??
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Me love you long time! -- Really? Sure doesn't seem like it, oh evil chinese buffet
Tip of the day:
Don't eat at any chinese buffet which calls itself the "Best Value in Town." You will end up sweating beads and sitting/laying on the couch for the rest of the night just waiting to die. And it's not good for a hangover.
Yeah yeah so the hangover was gone by about 11 this morning, but all I'm saying is English muffins and lox (cream cheese and salmon) simply do nothing for curing the nausea which comes with mixing tequila and rum. It was a good idea at the time! (Do you have a flag?)
Anyway, for a comment that should make everyone involved highly uncomfortable (and perhaps risk running off my boyfriend - which could be happening regardless) - the situations of all my friends as compared to mine completely irk me. Alright, so Babcia tells me that I shouldn't compare other people's situations, love or otherwise to my own since I am usually in completely different circumstances in the first place, which is certainly true with my love life.
What brings this up? The fact that it seems that everyone I know is in a seriously committed, mature relationship and I am not. Now, this is not to say that we are (a) not committed, or (b) not mature, but all of my friends seem to be either living together or married, save a couple. All his friends are either in our status (I kinda assume, as I never hang out with his friends...) or single.
Okay, yeah, so this can be a little frustrating for a girl, especially one who has been craving stability for at least a year. But, our situation is a tad different than everyone else's, mainly in these two aspects: (1) We're in a long distance relationship of a whopping 5 hours (he's in MI) and (2) Both of us are still in school. In those respective states. So while I crave stability, I'm not even in the state to actually have that in the first place - so I know it's going to be at least 2 years no matter who I'm with. And while I'm glad others are happy getting married in the middle of school, I know I just can't do that.
I suppose I should minimize the risk of being told "Uhh Hey Michelle. I've had a good time with you, but I just don't think we should see each other because you're SCARY" by making a disclaimer: I'm not interested in marriage at this time. I'm just jealous that others have seemed to further (is that the word?) their lives in ways that I cannot. Suffice it to say that I feel that I've plateaued at being a perma-student who earns a mere $10/hr and that I will die alone, eaten by wild dogs.
Apparently a thing that comes with a mild case of food poisoning is a serious case of verbal diarrhea. Let's hope no one reads this.
Don't eat at any chinese buffet which calls itself the "Best Value in Town." You will end up sweating beads and sitting/laying on the couch for the rest of the night just waiting to die. And it's not good for a hangover.
Yeah yeah so the hangover was gone by about 11 this morning, but all I'm saying is English muffins and lox (cream cheese and salmon) simply do nothing for curing the nausea which comes with mixing tequila and rum. It was a good idea at the time! (Do you have a flag?)
Anyway, for a comment that should make everyone involved highly uncomfortable (and perhaps risk running off my boyfriend - which could be happening regardless) - the situations of all my friends as compared to mine completely irk me. Alright, so Babcia tells me that I shouldn't compare other people's situations, love or otherwise to my own since I am usually in completely different circumstances in the first place, which is certainly true with my love life.
What brings this up? The fact that it seems that everyone I know is in a seriously committed, mature relationship and I am not. Now, this is not to say that we are (a) not committed, or (b) not mature, but all of my friends seem to be either living together or married, save a couple. All his friends are either in our status (I kinda assume, as I never hang out with his friends...) or single.
Okay, yeah, so this can be a little frustrating for a girl, especially one who has been craving stability for at least a year. But, our situation is a tad different than everyone else's, mainly in these two aspects: (1) We're in a long distance relationship of a whopping 5 hours (he's in MI) and (2) Both of us are still in school. In those respective states. So while I crave stability, I'm not even in the state to actually have that in the first place - so I know it's going to be at least 2 years no matter who I'm with. And while I'm glad others are happy getting married in the middle of school, I know I just can't do that.
I suppose I should minimize the risk of being told "Uhh Hey Michelle. I've had a good time with you, but I just don't think we should see each other because you're SCARY" by making a disclaimer: I'm not interested in marriage at this time. I'm just jealous that others have seemed to further (is that the word?) their lives in ways that I cannot. Suffice it to say that I feel that I've plateaued at being a perma-student who earns a mere $10/hr and that I will die alone, eaten by wild dogs.
Apparently a thing that comes with a mild case of food poisoning is a serious case of verbal diarrhea. Let's hope no one reads this.
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Raw fish is good for the soul!
Sushi and wine have to be the best combination in the world- especially after a stressful week of stuffing envelopes and getting yelled at about "duplicates" and people not doing their job, and blah blah blah...speaking of which, apparently I need an attitude adjustment.
It seems the boys are starting to complain about my response to being given work - I'm being told I grunt, say something smart-ass, or whatever. It's true - and it's not intentional - and I think it's a response to not having a break at all this summer, and the fact that the people giving the work are generally sitting on their ass doing nothing while I'm doing 3 things at once. Maybe I'm just negative and having an "ego-trip" like I'm being told. I don't know. In any case, I suppose I should work on that if I want to keep my job - right? Cause the only way you can keep your job is if people like working with you...regardless of the quality of work you put out in the first place. This is very odd to me, because generally I don't have a problem with people since I'm usually pleasant and all that. Maybe I've just gone hateful.
Also, we're in the middle of the whole political fundraiser going on next weekend (what's sad is I didn't put his name so my page couldn't be googled - which is in the dictionary btw)and finally managed to get the invitations out - all 1,100 of them! Yayyy!!! I'm halfway excited about it, and I'm halfway tired - but all in all I think it's a good experience and probably better than the 8 weeks I spent studying for finals that I probably did mediocre on. :)
Another awesome thing is I managed to get in touch with a couple of friends from high school within the last week - and that excites me so much! I've missed them, and I'd like to see them again. By a couple, I mean 4 - including my hs boyfriend and his wife, who were both best friends of mine in school. I hope I get to see them soon - it would be kind of nice to remind myself of where I come from.
School in 2 weeks again! Ack!
It seems the boys are starting to complain about my response to being given work - I'm being told I grunt, say something smart-ass, or whatever. It's true - and it's not intentional - and I think it's a response to not having a break at all this summer, and the fact that the people giving the work are generally sitting on their ass doing nothing while I'm doing 3 things at once. Maybe I'm just negative and having an "ego-trip" like I'm being told. I don't know. In any case, I suppose I should work on that if I want to keep my job - right? Cause the only way you can keep your job is if people like working with you...regardless of the quality of work you put out in the first place. This is very odd to me, because generally I don't have a problem with people since I'm usually pleasant and all that. Maybe I've just gone hateful.
Also, we're in the middle of the whole political fundraiser going on next weekend (what's sad is I didn't put his name so my page couldn't be googled - which is in the dictionary btw)and finally managed to get the invitations out - all 1,100 of them! Yayyy!!! I'm halfway excited about it, and I'm halfway tired - but all in all I think it's a good experience and probably better than the 8 weeks I spent studying for finals that I probably did mediocre on. :)
Another awesome thing is I managed to get in touch with a couple of friends from high school within the last week - and that excites me so much! I've missed them, and I'd like to see them again. By a couple, I mean 4 - including my hs boyfriend and his wife, who were both best friends of mine in school. I hope I get to see them soon - it would be kind of nice to remind myself of where I come from.
School in 2 weeks again! Ack!
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
I hit six squirrels, five windshields, and 4 birds! I'm awesome!
Alright so it's time for my first bi-weekly (bi-monthly? I don't know. First post of 2 a month) post. And I suppose that everything can be summed up into one sentence:
My family is crazy.
Not just odd, slightly goofy crazy - I think they might be legitimately crazy. Who knows? Most of you have heard this, and those of you who haven't, I'm sorry I haven't kept in touch for a while. Things have been hectic what with work, school, and trying to keep up with my Dziadzius' in and out ride in the hospital as well as seeing mysterious people out of state.
In any case, back to the crazyness. Obviously first on the list is that Dziadzius has decided to make it part of his annual schedule to go into the hospital in about late May, early June. He's been in the hospital for about a month and a half now - he'll be fine, it's just stressful, obviously. So much so last week I went nuts when I thought I wouldn't be able to go out of town because my dad was going to be here...maybe I'm the crazy one.
Which comes to Crazy Story #2: My dad got married. That's right. I have a stepmom and stepsisters. Enough said.
Crazy Story #3: My mother is obsessed with her love life.
Ahh the experience of being a divorced child. I hope they don't see this. lol
Anyway, I should probably go to bed eventually. Other than the crazy family talk, I've had a really good week - I did manage to go out of state, and it was great! It was nice to see the K-Fed after not seeing him for a while, and it was good to actually get outside, where the fluorescent lights can't sap out the color from my skin.
Obviously this is one of my less interesting posts, with lots of "daily info" and little bitchy ranting. Maybe next time I'll have something more interesting to say, but I should probably get to bed. I've taken up walking across the river to work, and that requires getting up earlier!
My family is crazy.
Not just odd, slightly goofy crazy - I think they might be legitimately crazy. Who knows? Most of you have heard this, and those of you who haven't, I'm sorry I haven't kept in touch for a while. Things have been hectic what with work, school, and trying to keep up with my Dziadzius' in and out ride in the hospital as well as seeing mysterious people out of state.
In any case, back to the crazyness. Obviously first on the list is that Dziadzius has decided to make it part of his annual schedule to go into the hospital in about late May, early June. He's been in the hospital for about a month and a half now - he'll be fine, it's just stressful, obviously. So much so last week I went nuts when I thought I wouldn't be able to go out of town because my dad was going to be here...maybe I'm the crazy one.
Which comes to Crazy Story #2: My dad got married. That's right. I have a stepmom and stepsisters. Enough said.
Crazy Story #3: My mother is obsessed with her love life.
Ahh the experience of being a divorced child. I hope they don't see this. lol
Anyway, I should probably go to bed eventually. Other than the crazy family talk, I've had a really good week - I did manage to go out of state, and it was great! It was nice to see the K-Fed after not seeing him for a while, and it was good to actually get outside, where the fluorescent lights can't sap out the color from my skin.
Obviously this is one of my less interesting posts, with lots of "daily info" and little bitchy ranting. Maybe next time I'll have something more interesting to say, but I should probably get to bed. I've taken up walking across the river to work, and that requires getting up earlier!
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Monday, June 19, 2006
Die Deutsche kommen! Die Deutsche kommen!
Ich bin schlaffig. Ich musse zur mein Bett gehen!! Und so, Ich schlaffe. *zonk*
Yeah I know that was the worst German ever seen/heard.... I dun cur. So as I haven't written anything in here in a while, I should probably list my latest diatribe. *Dana you've already heard this, so you can feel free to just ignore.*
Diatribe #180,000
There's this new show on tv, called "How to get the Guy." And there's an article in Cosmo about "How to get the guy in 30 days." What the crap?? Aren't we supposed to think that we're independent, confident, self-sufficient women who don't spend our time trying to trap men and make them date us?? How desperate does the media think we are?
And where are these girls that listen? Please tell me, because if I find them, I will smack the sense back into them. Seriously - boys are great - really they are. And I suppose I can't say entirely too much because I'm with a boy. But there's a difference between normal girls with boyfriends (Not that I'm normal. Come on, I talk to hairbrushes) and scary girls who make 30 day plans to "catch their man." Like they're fish.
You know what? If you look that desperate, you're not going to get a guy anyway. So why try? Girls should be concentrating on making themselves happy and doing what they want/need to do, and stop concentrating on being part of that all important item.
There is more to life then pursuing the ultimate marriage with babies and strollers. You know what that life comes with? Baby puke and mortgages. And who wants baby puke? I'll just give the kids candy and send them home to their moms for now. Let them puke on them. This whole situation is about as bad as going to college to get a husband. Uggh.
End of Diatribe #180,000
On to other things:
I had an awesome time in Michigan this weekend, complete with the attempt to go to Gizzard Fest. That didn't quite work out so well, and as we had really high expectations of the event it was a little disappointing. But that's alright. I also have a new foot tattoo - it's really sexy - I know K-Fed likes it! He likes it so much he thinks I should throw my shoes out! ;) (It burns it burns!)
Let's see, what else....I got new office manager duties (mind you, not the promotion or the raise that comes with it. I can't get that while I'm working part-time) and today was my first day with the new responsibilities, and I about had a heart attack. I saw stuff on my desk that I had never really done before...but hopefully I figured it out. Needless to say, I feel slightly overwhelmed but then again I think I'll be fine eventually.
Okay I seriously am going to bed now. Early morning tomorrow and I KNOW the sun really will shine in my window and wake me up. :)
Yeah I know that was the worst German ever seen/heard.... I dun cur. So as I haven't written anything in here in a while, I should probably list my latest diatribe. *Dana you've already heard this, so you can feel free to just ignore.*
Diatribe #180,000
There's this new show on tv, called "How to get the Guy." And there's an article in Cosmo about "How to get the guy in 30 days." What the crap?? Aren't we supposed to think that we're independent, confident, self-sufficient women who don't spend our time trying to trap men and make them date us?? How desperate does the media think we are?
And where are these girls that listen? Please tell me, because if I find them, I will smack the sense back into them. Seriously - boys are great - really they are. And I suppose I can't say entirely too much because I'm with a boy. But there's a difference between normal girls with boyfriends (Not that I'm normal. Come on, I talk to hairbrushes) and scary girls who make 30 day plans to "catch their man." Like they're fish.
You know what? If you look that desperate, you're not going to get a guy anyway. So why try? Girls should be concentrating on making themselves happy and doing what they want/need to do, and stop concentrating on being part of that all important item.
There is more to life then pursuing the ultimate marriage with babies and strollers. You know what that life comes with? Baby puke and mortgages. And who wants baby puke? I'll just give the kids candy and send them home to their moms for now. Let them puke on them. This whole situation is about as bad as going to college to get a husband. Uggh.
End of Diatribe #180,000
On to other things:
I had an awesome time in Michigan this weekend, complete with the attempt to go to Gizzard Fest. That didn't quite work out so well, and as we had really high expectations of the event it was a little disappointing. But that's alright. I also have a new foot tattoo - it's really sexy - I know K-Fed likes it! He likes it so much he thinks I should throw my shoes out! ;) (It burns it burns!)
Let's see, what else....I got new office manager duties (mind you, not the promotion or the raise that comes with it. I can't get that while I'm working part-time) and today was my first day with the new responsibilities, and I about had a heart attack. I saw stuff on my desk that I had never really done before...but hopefully I figured it out. Needless to say, I feel slightly overwhelmed but then again I think I'll be fine eventually.
Okay I seriously am going to bed now. Early morning tomorrow and I KNOW the sun really will shine in my window and wake me up. :)
Sunday, June 04, 2006
I WANNA GO PLAY!! LET ME GO PLAY!!
Okay so I haven’t kept up with my 2 posts a month. I bet you all are REALLY upset. ;) So I suppose it’s time for my quarterly rant about work, though I have to say I’ve been enjoying it lately…does that make me a bad person? Or is it just because my ego is about 1000 times bigger because of everything? (As if I needed to be anymore conceited or anything…)
Maybe I should explain: The war that Cathy predicted would happen is coming true….the two main guys in my office HATE each other. I’d say they have good reasons for either side, really – though *gasp surprise* I’m kinda on Chris’ side. It could be because the other guy (Mr. Look I’m doing Cathy’s Job Cause She’s Not Here – Oh Wait. No I’m not.) does absolutely nothing all day, complains about being here, and then tells everyone they’re stupid. Oh well – it’s his own downfall I suppose…..the only reason he even has that stupid job is because I have to go to summer classes and am therefore working part-time.
Thus the reason for a big ego – because everyone there thinks he’s doing a bad job, I’m suddenly looking a lot better. But the only thing this does is give me more responsibility – I want the raise to go with it! Dammit! Oh well. I think I’ll be fine, and I doubt there’s really much of a shift anyway – I’ll probably just end up doing the same thing I already do.
Alright on to better things – halfway through summer school now, so that makes it closer to not failing out of school if I’m disciplined and closer to being able to do what I want! Hopefully that includes seeing all you lovely people. All of you need to move to Cincinnati – I mean come on…Louisville, Lexington, Michigan…can’t you all just be in one place? For me? Mleh. ‘Salright I suppose I can drive.
Alright, being as I don’t really have too much to say, I’ll leave you all to do better things. Like anyone reads this. (
Maybe I should explain: The war that Cathy predicted would happen is coming true….the two main guys in my office HATE each other. I’d say they have good reasons for either side, really – though *gasp surprise* I’m kinda on Chris’ side. It could be because the other guy (Mr. Look I’m doing Cathy’s Job Cause She’s Not Here – Oh Wait. No I’m not.) does absolutely nothing all day, complains about being here, and then tells everyone they’re stupid. Oh well – it’s his own downfall I suppose…..the only reason he even has that stupid job is because I have to go to summer classes and am therefore working part-time.
Thus the reason for a big ego – because everyone there thinks he’s doing a bad job, I’m suddenly looking a lot better. But the only thing this does is give me more responsibility – I want the raise to go with it! Dammit! Oh well. I think I’ll be fine, and I doubt there’s really much of a shift anyway – I’ll probably just end up doing the same thing I already do.
Alright on to better things – halfway through summer school now, so that makes it closer to not failing out of school if I’m disciplined and closer to being able to do what I want! Hopefully that includes seeing all you lovely people. All of you need to move to Cincinnati – I mean come on…Louisville, Lexington, Michigan…can’t you all just be in one place? For me? Mleh. ‘Salright I suppose I can drive.
Alright, being as I don’t really have too much to say, I’ll leave you all to do better things. Like anyone reads this. (
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Hmm hmm hmmm
Alright Lauren, I now know how you feel. I went to the Cincinnati Zoo today (for the first time!) and I got felt up by a 3 year old. A three year old!! I mean - who does that? It's almost as bad as when this client brought in her kid, and showed him pictures of half-naked girls (from Cosmo of course. We actually keep those in our "lobby" - ie, 3 feet away from my desk)and asked him if he thought they were pretty and he started MASTURBATING. The kid was 4. FOUR. Disgusting.
So anyway, after this toddler copped a feel, the mom apologized and I just went "Umm...it's okay...." and she said (the quote of the day kids) "Yeah, it's okay when he's 3, but not when he's 30!" and walked off to the monkey exhibit or whatever. I swear. What do you say about that?? Apparently K-Fed didn't catch the main event - as it lasted about 2 seconds - but he said that if he had he would have pushed the kid into the penguin exhibit. Awwww - K-Fed, you don't have to push toddlers into dangerous penguin exhibits for me - I can do that myself! *BAM! In the face!*
Anyway so that's enough of that. The zoo was a good time though - I likey aminals. I think they're cute. Also of note, I won the Derby today! AGAIN, Bitches (No, Michelle, Ben's not here. He's somewhere being a nerd and not talking to anyone.)!! I win almost EVERY YEAR! HA! I kinda wish I had put money on it...apparently Kori and I are going next year and the rule is I have to touch the 20 dollar bill and make the decision on the horse so we can win meeeelllions of doolllllars. Because 20 dollars will always turn into millions if you get the Derby winner. I added it up today, and had we won, we would have gotten a whole $120 out of it because Barbaro's odds were 6-1. Not quite millions, but still respectable, ja?
So I'm a week into my 2 week break from school, and I'm already going "where's the textbooks? Why aren't I studying?" I swear to God I might need some psychological help, but ehh. I dun cur.
Side note - I'm not sure this thing is really about expressing my opinions anymore as telling people how dumb I am sometimes. Speaking of dumb, I stapled my finger last week. It was friggin hilarious - who staples themselves?? Ohhh wait. Me. HA!
Alright it's friggin 1 am (too much caffeine already) and I'm going to bed.
So anyway, after this toddler copped a feel, the mom apologized and I just went "Umm...it's okay...." and she said (the quote of the day kids) "Yeah, it's okay when he's 3, but not when he's 30!" and walked off to the monkey exhibit or whatever. I swear. What do you say about that?? Apparently K-Fed didn't catch the main event - as it lasted about 2 seconds - but he said that if he had he would have pushed the kid into the penguin exhibit. Awwww - K-Fed, you don't have to push toddlers into dangerous penguin exhibits for me - I can do that myself! *BAM! In the face!*
Anyway so that's enough of that. The zoo was a good time though - I likey aminals. I think they're cute. Also of note, I won the Derby today! AGAIN, Bitches (No, Michelle, Ben's not here. He's somewhere being a nerd and not talking to anyone.)!! I win almost EVERY YEAR! HA! I kinda wish I had put money on it...apparently Kori and I are going next year and the rule is I have to touch the 20 dollar bill and make the decision on the horse so we can win meeeelllions of doolllllars. Because 20 dollars will always turn into millions if you get the Derby winner. I added it up today, and had we won, we would have gotten a whole $120 out of it because Barbaro's odds were 6-1. Not quite millions, but still respectable, ja?
So I'm a week into my 2 week break from school, and I'm already going "where's the textbooks? Why aren't I studying?" I swear to God I might need some psychological help, but ehh. I dun cur.
Side note - I'm not sure this thing is really about expressing my opinions anymore as telling people how dumb I am sometimes. Speaking of dumb, I stapled my finger last week. It was friggin hilarious - who staples themselves?? Ohhh wait. Me. HA!
Alright it's friggin 1 am (too much caffeine already) and I'm going to bed.
Saturday, April 22, 2006
Jew with no soul seen at McD's today - orders entire menu and demands discount
My diatribe of the day (ooh diatribe. What a great word - sounds like you might actually know something when really....you may just be ign'rn't. That's how you spell that, right? No vowels?) is about how I have no soul. Yeah I think I've told a couple of you this within the last week, but let me explain anyway - I think it's fun. I mean, we knew I was going to hell (You! Jew! You're going to hell!) but NOW we have proof that I have no soul.
So then does that mean I'm not going to hell? People with no souls can't go to hell, can they?
Anyway.....to go on with it (get on with it will you??)
We took in a new case at the beginning of the week, and Chris (aka Hey I'm an attorney guy) was showing me her injuries and whatnot, explaining that it was a good case. He likes to do this because I think he feels I should feel purposeful or whatever. In any case, I looked at it, and here is what I said kids:
"Well, I'd like this case better if she had broken some bones."
Yes, yes. I wanted her to break a leg so that we could get more money for the firm.
I. Have. No. Soul.
And so I discuss this with a few of my law school friends, and have since determined that none of us have souls...because they felt the same way I do. What's wrong with us?? When does it come to a point when you want someone to be even more hurt than they are so that you can support the case better and thus get a bigger settlement/judgment???
This is why the general public hates lawyers. All we want is the big payoff.
End of Diatribe
In any case, I haven't had any hilarious diseases lately (what?? Herpes of the Throat???) or had any fun trips or experiences..unless you consider studying for finals a fun experience. My awesome presence has invaded this library for about 2 weeks now and will continue to do so until next Monday. I'm sorry for ignoring all you cool kids but we know how the routine goes.
Oh you don't?? Okay here you go:
Work
School (MWF)
Study/Outline
And this goes on forever and ever. So the answer to "What have you been up to?" Please read the above. Work, school, and studying.
However, I did break the routine last night by watching gay cowboys and eating chinese with wine - which actually wasn't too bad...I mean the food and the alcohol portion. The movie - it wasn't so hot. In fact, I think it violated me - physically violated me with it's pure graphic nature....and didn't even apologize for it either. But we had a good time laughing at it!!
Oh and I think my stomach is threatening to secede again - well too bad! Just for threatening, I'll give it more fat, salt and caffeine! Ha ha!
So then does that mean I'm not going to hell? People with no souls can't go to hell, can they?
Anyway.....to go on with it (get on with it will you??)
We took in a new case at the beginning of the week, and Chris (aka Hey I'm an attorney guy) was showing me her injuries and whatnot, explaining that it was a good case. He likes to do this because I think he feels I should feel purposeful or whatever. In any case, I looked at it, and here is what I said kids:
"Well, I'd like this case better if she had broken some bones."
Yes, yes. I wanted her to break a leg so that we could get more money for the firm.
I. Have. No. Soul.
And so I discuss this with a few of my law school friends, and have since determined that none of us have souls...because they felt the same way I do. What's wrong with us?? When does it come to a point when you want someone to be even more hurt than they are so that you can support the case better and thus get a bigger settlement/judgment???
This is why the general public hates lawyers. All we want is the big payoff.
End of Diatribe
In any case, I haven't had any hilarious diseases lately (what?? Herpes of the Throat???) or had any fun trips or experiences..unless you consider studying for finals a fun experience. My awesome presence has invaded this library for about 2 weeks now and will continue to do so until next Monday. I'm sorry for ignoring all you cool kids but we know how the routine goes.
Oh you don't?? Okay here you go:
Work
School (MWF)
Study/Outline
And this goes on forever and ever. So the answer to "What have you been up to?" Please read the above. Work, school, and studying.
However, I did break the routine last night by watching gay cowboys and eating chinese with wine - which actually wasn't too bad...I mean the food and the alcohol portion. The movie - it wasn't so hot. In fact, I think it violated me - physically violated me with it's pure graphic nature....and didn't even apologize for it either. But we had a good time laughing at it!!
Oh and I think my stomach is threatening to secede again - well too bad! Just for threatening, I'll give it more fat, salt and caffeine! Ha ha!
Sunday, April 09, 2006
AAAHHHHH I NEED TO STUDY!
So the anxiety has finally set in. I am now ready to sit and outline like my ass is going to fall off. (You liked that, didn't you? Asses falling off. It's great.) The K-Fed is leaving this morning so that gives me a little more time to concentrate on school instead of letting people distract me! So my plan for this morning - take a shower, head to the coffeehouse and order a waffle, outline, skip my study session cause I have nothing ready for it, and study until my eyes burn from the computer screen. Let's not forget the eye drops and the nexium for my stomach. Always important. YES!!
In other news, my birthday was last Wednesday and it was celebrated for a week! How awesome is that?? Lauren and Dana threw me a surprise birthday party last Friday (the 1st) and completely tricked me. It was astounding how unobservant I am lol (Or how sneaky they are!) So let me tell you all what went down. Cause all of you care. Of course all of you were there......so okay I'm going to tell you anyway!!
So I get a text message from Dana in the middle of class asking if I was up for the night, and I said no. Then nothing. 1 hour later, I get a message saying she's drunk from decorating Barristers and I should come get her.....after she made a big friggin deal about wanting to hang out with me on Friday night and I had a Horrible day - to cut that whole thing short Dana had me going like an Irish person on alcohol. I was going to go off when I saw her...and I did. I "lectured" her all the way into the lobby and up the elevator (she "lost" her shoes) and even until we got to the door.
Of course, I thought we were in the wrong room. So....the quote of the night:
"Dana, I don't think this is the right room, there's a Happy Birthday banner. I think we're walking into someone's birthday party."
So in any case it was an awesome birthday party and I love my friends for doing it for me. It was fabulous. All in all this has been a good week.
Other recaps: Barrister's was fabulous (he can dance he can dance!), I am now Events Coordinator for the WLC, and I got pink roses at my door on my birthday. :)
See?? I'm not always negative. There's your happy fun story for the year - I will continue my ranting and raving on the next one. Thank you for coming, and have another Squishy.
In other news, my birthday was last Wednesday and it was celebrated for a week! How awesome is that?? Lauren and Dana threw me a surprise birthday party last Friday (the 1st) and completely tricked me. It was astounding how unobservant I am lol (Or how sneaky they are!) So let me tell you all what went down. Cause all of you care. Of course all of you were there......so okay I'm going to tell you anyway!!
So I get a text message from Dana in the middle of class asking if I was up for the night, and I said no. Then nothing. 1 hour later, I get a message saying she's drunk from decorating Barristers and I should come get her.....after she made a big friggin deal about wanting to hang out with me on Friday night and I had a Horrible day - to cut that whole thing short Dana had me going like an Irish person on alcohol. I was going to go off when I saw her...and I did. I "lectured" her all the way into the lobby and up the elevator (she "lost" her shoes) and even until we got to the door.
Of course, I thought we were in the wrong room. So....the quote of the night:
"Dana, I don't think this is the right room, there's a Happy Birthday banner. I think we're walking into someone's birthday party."
So in any case it was an awesome birthday party and I love my friends for doing it for me. It was fabulous. All in all this has been a good week.
Other recaps: Barrister's was fabulous (he can dance he can dance!), I am now Events Coordinator for the WLC, and I got pink roses at my door on my birthday. :)
See?? I'm not always negative. There's your happy fun story for the year - I will continue my ranting and raving on the next one. Thank you for coming, and have another Squishy.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Bllaeerrhhhh *Mommy why is there drool on her chin?*
As I sit here, with my whitestrips on and my rosacea cream on my face - the former which makes you drool and the latter makes you kinda feel diseased - I realize that not only is this picture slightly unattractive but I might be a little boring.
I was talking to K-Fed earlier in the evening and we got into the discussion of hobbies. You know, things you do outside of either work or school which you might enjoy on a regular basis. Hobbies do not include anything that has social value unless it's an activity. Let's be really nerdy and go find a definition, shall we?
Hobby: An activity or interest pursued outside one's regular occupation and engaged in primarily for pleasure. (Dictionary.com)
I bring this up for one main reason. We were discussing his intense obsession with fantasy anything, which of course I think is obscenely nerdy (haha- says the pot to the kettle) and so he asked me what my hobbies were then. I literally could not find a single one. Not one! I remember the hobbies I used to have - you know, making jewelry, karate, making an occasional candle or scarf, writing crap that no one reads, playing the piano, hiking like once a year - but then I realized I don't do any of that now. I mean, I went hiking a couple of weeks ago, but does that really count? What about writing this? Does it count? I only spend maybe 10 minutes on it twice a month or so, so I'm not sure it really does.
What's sad is he defined it as something that gives you a sense of accomplishment, which law school certainly doesn't. But I never thought of hobbies as giving a sense of accomplishment - work does that for me. Especially lately what with the raise, the increased flexibility/responsibility, and the fact that for some odd reason Chris is being nice to me.
Besides, what time I do have to myself goes toward social stuff - you know, apparently people want to see me on occasion. I don't know what that's about. I wouldn't want to see me - I'm boring and I have drool on my chin. lol
So anyway - what I would like to do to change this:
1. Find some sort of instrument that I can drag into my apartment. I'd love to have a keyboard with 88 keys. But we knew this.
2. Get back with the dance lessons. I don't care if I have to go alone, because I enjoy it. I'd rather have a dance partner (eases the awkwardness) but if we can't get our schedules together then... *shrug*
3. OR as an alternative, I'd love to find some yoga class or karate class that fits in my schedule.
Maybe I should work on that.
I was talking to K-Fed earlier in the evening and we got into the discussion of hobbies. You know, things you do outside of either work or school which you might enjoy on a regular basis. Hobbies do not include anything that has social value unless it's an activity. Let's be really nerdy and go find a definition, shall we?
Hobby: An activity or interest pursued outside one's regular occupation and engaged in primarily for pleasure. (Dictionary.com)
I bring this up for one main reason. We were discussing his intense obsession with fantasy anything, which of course I think is obscenely nerdy (haha- says the pot to the kettle) and so he asked me what my hobbies were then. I literally could not find a single one. Not one! I remember the hobbies I used to have - you know, making jewelry, karate, making an occasional candle or scarf, writing crap that no one reads, playing the piano, hiking like once a year - but then I realized I don't do any of that now. I mean, I went hiking a couple of weeks ago, but does that really count? What about writing this? Does it count? I only spend maybe 10 minutes on it twice a month or so, so I'm not sure it really does.
What's sad is he defined it as something that gives you a sense of accomplishment, which law school certainly doesn't. But I never thought of hobbies as giving a sense of accomplishment - work does that for me. Especially lately what with the raise, the increased flexibility/responsibility, and the fact that for some odd reason Chris is being nice to me.
Besides, what time I do have to myself goes toward social stuff - you know, apparently people want to see me on occasion. I don't know what that's about. I wouldn't want to see me - I'm boring and I have drool on my chin. lol
So anyway - what I would like to do to change this:
1. Find some sort of instrument that I can drag into my apartment. I'd love to have a keyboard with 88 keys. But we knew this.
2. Get back with the dance lessons. I don't care if I have to go alone, because I enjoy it. I'd rather have a dance partner (eases the awkwardness) but if we can't get our schedules together then... *shrug*
3. OR as an alternative, I'd love to find some yoga class or karate class that fits in my schedule.
Maybe I should work on that.
Monday, March 06, 2006
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Who's a lazy ass?? ME! :)
Blah dee blah…I am severely unmotivated this semester. I think I’ve already missed my allowed number of classes in both Con Law and Property, and it’s heading there in Civ Pro. Yes, one of them for Con Law and Civ Pro were because I was sick (I believe I almost died there for a couple of days. Kinda wished my mom would have come up and taken care of me..but that’s because I’m a big baby.) but we know the other times I missed were because I was lazy. Or wanted to see a basketball game. (shut up – you all know who I’m talking to)
But guess what?? Spring break is next week!! Know what I’ll be doing? Working! lol And hopefully going to Chicago (plans seem to be getting delayed and looser…I really want to go but I guess I can’t force sick people to book hotels). And I’m sure some people are getting angry for me not paying them any mind (sorry Mom. And skankity hoes in Louisville.) Anyone have any ideas for stuff to do there? I’ve never been, and I’m starting to think I’ve never really gone anywhere North of Cincy aside from DC and that time we pretty much ran through all the states to Vermont. Go frozen Niagara falls!! In any case, I’m excited because I haven’t gone on vacation in over 2 years. 2 years!! Who does that?!
Oh – weird update of the week: my father is dating 2 people at once. He’s literally a big fat whore. Yeah yeah, you laugh – but you’re not the one listening to him about how he’s having sex with both of them! Yeah, that’s right – if I have to know, so does the entire world.
Another kinda cool update – I got a job!! (at least I hope that’s what he meant) Apparently my telling Cathy I might not stay at the firm for much longer got Greg to tell me that (a) he was planning on expanding the firm’s specialties – score no pi and (b) “We can always get a bigger suite. Our lease is up in less than 2 years” which is when I graduate. I’m excited about that too.
So knowing that everything is pretty much going well, why can’t I get motivated to study?? Maybe I need trauma and stress to get me to actually concentrate. Uggh. Stupidity.
But guess what?? Spring break is next week!! Know what I’ll be doing? Working! lol And hopefully going to Chicago (plans seem to be getting delayed and looser…I really want to go but I guess I can’t force sick people to book hotels). And I’m sure some people are getting angry for me not paying them any mind (sorry Mom. And skankity hoes in Louisville.) Anyone have any ideas for stuff to do there? I’ve never been, and I’m starting to think I’ve never really gone anywhere North of Cincy aside from DC and that time we pretty much ran through all the states to Vermont. Go frozen Niagara falls!! In any case, I’m excited because I haven’t gone on vacation in over 2 years. 2 years!! Who does that?!
Oh – weird update of the week: my father is dating 2 people at once. He’s literally a big fat whore. Yeah yeah, you laugh – but you’re not the one listening to him about how he’s having sex with both of them! Yeah, that’s right – if I have to know, so does the entire world.
Another kinda cool update – I got a job!! (at least I hope that’s what he meant) Apparently my telling Cathy I might not stay at the firm for much longer got Greg to tell me that (a) he was planning on expanding the firm’s specialties – score no pi and (b) “We can always get a bigger suite. Our lease is up in less than 2 years” which is when I graduate. I’m excited about that too.
So knowing that everything is pretty much going well, why can’t I get motivated to study?? Maybe I need trauma and stress to get me to actually concentrate. Uggh. Stupidity.
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Friday, February 17, 2006
Viral-Infected Delirium - Why am I going to class?
Okay, so being sick isn’t fun. Especially not when it’s a viral infection where you have to take this topical ointment, put it on your finger, and then shove your finger down your throat to make the pain stop. And flu-like aches and pains. But I’ve discovered what makes the pains go away (or rather my doctor did)! Tylenol and Advil TOGETHER! It’s like a pain reliever cocktail!
What’s great about this is I’ll have it for about 7-10 days. Which is coincidentally, the amount of time I’ll be contagious. Guess I can’t go around kissing any strangers. Damn. *sarcasm sarcasm*
But you know what’s better than viral infections? BLINKY GLASSES AND FUZZY PINK HATS!! That’s right kids, I own a fuzzy pink hat and a pair of blinky glasses which I intend to torture everyone with on a normal basis. Because I’m a freak – and think it’s high-larious (as Lauren would say). I got those at the bat mitzvah last weekend, or rather they were stolen for me because I wouldn’t shut up about them. I was even forced to wear the hat for a picture. By forced I mean told “You’re going to wear this hat” and my response was “Okay!”
You know the good part about having a viral infection? It gives me an excuse to watch 6 out of the 9 episodes of the first season of Grey’s Anatomy. *Awesome present* That was lots of fun. All in all, I’m having a good albeit delirious day. At least I told my professor not to call on me – that’s a good thing.
So, Skank, here you go – my update for the day/week/month. And happy birthday to all you people this week!!
What’s great about this is I’ll have it for about 7-10 days. Which is coincidentally, the amount of time I’ll be contagious. Guess I can’t go around kissing any strangers. Damn. *sarcasm sarcasm*
But you know what’s better than viral infections? BLINKY GLASSES AND FUZZY PINK HATS!! That’s right kids, I own a fuzzy pink hat and a pair of blinky glasses which I intend to torture everyone with on a normal basis. Because I’m a freak – and think it’s high-larious (as Lauren would say). I got those at the bat mitzvah last weekend, or rather they were stolen for me because I wouldn’t shut up about them. I was even forced to wear the hat for a picture. By forced I mean told “You’re going to wear this hat” and my response was “Okay!”
You know the good part about having a viral infection? It gives me an excuse to watch 6 out of the 9 episodes of the first season of Grey’s Anatomy. *Awesome present* That was lots of fun. All in all, I’m having a good albeit delirious day. At least I told my professor not to call on me – that’s a good thing.
So, Skank, here you go – my update for the day/week/month. And happy birthday to all you people this week!!
Friday, February 03, 2006
Hey, Groundhog! Come here! *punch*
Alright, so today (yesterday) was Groundhog Day. The day we all wonder whether we will have 6 more weeks of winter, and inevitably, we always do. Well, this winter has been indescribably weird what with all the spring-like weather mixed with sporadic bouts of snow.
I have decided that this season can only mean 2 things: (a) the polar ice caps are melting (yes they ARE called ice caps - I did NOT make it up, I swear to GOD - oh wait. I should be a good Jew. G-D.) and (b) since the weather has decided to change its pattern, it makes people in general frustrated with their own stagnant lives and change their patterns.
Thus far I've gone antsy and changed a few things, but today I got so frustrated that I came thisclose to changing my job and moving to Newport. Let me explain.
I no longer know why I'm working at my firm. Let me list my frustrations for you:
1. I don't do anything legally related. Which I should be doing because I need to learn practical processes and all that for when I pass the bar. And yes, I do know that I have 2 more years to go before I even start studying for it, and yes, I do know that I am assuming I even will pass the bar. But I have to plan my life 20 years ahead. We know this.
I have decided that this season can only mean 2 things: (a) the polar ice caps are melting (yes they ARE called ice caps - I did NOT make it up, I swear to GOD - oh wait. I should be a good Jew. G-D.) and (b) since the weather has decided to change its pattern, it makes people in general frustrated with their own stagnant lives and change their patterns.
Thus far I've gone antsy and changed a few things, but today I got so frustrated that I came thisclose to changing my job and moving to Newport. Let me explain.
I no longer know why I'm working at my firm. Let me list my frustrations for you:
1. I don't do anything legally related. Which I should be doing because I need to learn practical processes and all that for when I pass the bar. And yes, I do know that I have 2 more years to go before I even start studying for it, and yes, I do know that I am assuming I even will pass the bar. But I have to plan my life 20 years ahead. We know this.
2. There seems to be no future there for me for 2 reasons:
- Most importantly, I have no interest in personal injury. I like the people there, but it still seems like the easy way out and I abhor most of our clients. I can do better, and I will.
- When the "senior" employees discuss the future, I am never included. Now, I have been told that I will have no problem in the legal field and that it's the right area for me (per my attorney boss), but when the expansion of the firm is discussed, the only people included are the junior associate, and the other two law students. Not me. I'm not even treated as if I am a law student. In fact, my OM called me a secretary yesterday. A secretary. I did not graduate college and go to law school to be a secretary. Monkeys could do that work. Or at least I'm convinced that monkeys could do my work. Maybe I'm wrong. Who knows.
Now the question is - why do I care? If I don't know what I'm doing there, why don't I leave? Well the main reason is that I have an immense guilt complex (which I will readily attribute to my family) and feel that if I leave before our OM takes the bar, everyone will be stuck. But I was made aware today that I need to start thinking about what I Need for myself and not necessarily what everyone else needs. I was not brought up to think on these terms. I was brought up to do what was necessary for the time being and for the best of all the people I was dealing with and then think of change later. However, I cannot live on 9.50 an hour.
My solution: I'm going to demand a raise. If I do not get a significant raise, I am leaving. This is crap.
Frustration #2: Apartment!!
Yes, I need to move. It is becoming increasingly apparent that I live in the gh-etto and that it's probably not safe for a single woman of 23 years. So I should probably move somewhere safer. Maybe Newport. Maybe ... I don't know. We'll see. First I have to see if anyone will help me move all my heavy ass furniture. Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? Okay I guess not. lol
Alright I guess everyone has their spaz moment, and that was mine. I should seriously go to bed.
On a positive note, I'm doing well otherwise! My goal for this weekend is to find a dress for the bat mitzvah next Saturday - anyone think I can find one within one day? I think so. It'll be fabulous. And if I can work it right, I'll be taking dance lessons this week too - how cool am I? Ha.
Okay night.
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Pluto, etc.
I got released from review on writing demands (the simple ones anyway)! Yay! I’m moving up in the world…hahaha. So now I don’t feel as bad about work…I got reamed out a couple of weeks ago on my performance or lack thereof. Now, I’m being told that I’m doing really well and should be prepared when my OM goes to study for the bar in the summer. Thank God – I needed a kick in the ass to get myself back in gear. Seriously. I’ve never been the passive type, and since I always think I’m right anyway I better damn well be. Am I Right? (Yes, of course you are.) When she took me aside and told me how I was performing well below my capabilities, it forced me to think of the person I have become.
Not necessarily that I’m lazy, just that I’ve wandered far from the strong-willed, confident person that actually has some leadership qualities. Those qualities have seemed all but gone until just a few weeks ago when I’ve had quite a few realizations about the reality in which I live. I won’t go into detail – that’s too boring for most people – but suffice it to say that I now know who I am and how I need to behave. So far, I think I’m doing swimmingly, thank you – it seems to be working rather well for me!
On another note, I know this is a little late for discussion but did anyone see the shuttle go into space last week? Going to Pluto?? I think it’s amazing that we can now get to the moon in 9 hours whereas 40 years ago it would have taken us 3 days. It’s amazing we can get there at all. How is it that we have managed to progress so quickly? Astounding.
Alright I should study. There’s my update for the moment!
Not necessarily that I’m lazy, just that I’ve wandered far from the strong-willed, confident person that actually has some leadership qualities. Those qualities have seemed all but gone until just a few weeks ago when I’ve had quite a few realizations about the reality in which I live. I won’t go into detail – that’s too boring for most people – but suffice it to say that I now know who I am and how I need to behave. So far, I think I’m doing swimmingly, thank you – it seems to be working rather well for me!
On another note, I know this is a little late for discussion but did anyone see the shuttle go into space last week? Going to Pluto?? I think it’s amazing that we can now get to the moon in 9 hours whereas 40 years ago it would have taken us 3 days. It’s amazing we can get there at all. How is it that we have managed to progress so quickly? Astounding.
Alright I should study. There’s my update for the moment!
Sunday, January 08, 2006
Lazy lazy day
Ahh, the last Sunday before school starts back. As a few people know, I had a pretty good weekend, what with the grade celebrations on Friday and the being comatose until ohhhh 1 on Saturday morning. Great stuff.
Now I have to go back to studying – which oddly enough is just fine with me. I’m ready to get back into the crazy schedule I’m usually on, but I’m also glad I managed to get in as much social time as I have these past couple of weeks. The fun thing is that I’m probably heading to Lex next weekend to play DDR with Dana! That’s right, kids! DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION!! Lol
I’m 15 years old and Asian, in case you haven’t guessed. Speaking of stereotypes (cause we all know it’s the 15 year old Asian boy that’s always on the DDR machine), I think it’s funny how we all object to stereotypes and how “awful” they are…but we adhere to them when judging other people. Oh and let’s not forget we tend to fit them. Not to be too un-pc, but let’s be honest.
There’s a reason we came up with these stupid group identifiers – it’s because different groups of people tend to act certain ways. For instance, my friend Cathy talks about Eastern Europeans being kinda dirty. (She insists that my family is from Middle Europe, not Eastern Europe – therefore not dirty. Just drink a lot of vodka.) At first I was flabbergasted (damn that's a good earth – I mean word. Sorry.) And then I started thinking about it…..even my grandparents call their Russian friends the “dirty Russkys”. And it’s a little true….so I can’t say anything about them anymore. ;)
Even so – I’m not saying that abiding by stereotypes is a good thing. People are still individuals. Even if I am studying to be a lawyer just like a good little Jew. And white boys still can’t dance. :-D
Now I have to go back to studying – which oddly enough is just fine with me. I’m ready to get back into the crazy schedule I’m usually on, but I’m also glad I managed to get in as much social time as I have these past couple of weeks. The fun thing is that I’m probably heading to Lex next weekend to play DDR with Dana! That’s right, kids! DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION!! Lol
I’m 15 years old and Asian, in case you haven’t guessed. Speaking of stereotypes (cause we all know it’s the 15 year old Asian boy that’s always on the DDR machine), I think it’s funny how we all object to stereotypes and how “awful” they are…but we adhere to them when judging other people. Oh and let’s not forget we tend to fit them. Not to be too un-pc, but let’s be honest.
There’s a reason we came up with these stupid group identifiers – it’s because different groups of people tend to act certain ways. For instance, my friend Cathy talks about Eastern Europeans being kinda dirty. (She insists that my family is from Middle Europe, not Eastern Europe – therefore not dirty. Just drink a lot of vodka.) At first I was flabbergasted (damn that's a good earth – I mean word. Sorry.) And then I started thinking about it…..even my grandparents call their Russian friends the “dirty Russkys”. And it’s a little true….so I can’t say anything about them anymore. ;)
Even so – I’m not saying that abiding by stereotypes is a good thing. People are still individuals. Even if I am studying to be a lawyer just like a good little Jew. And white boys still can’t dance. :-D
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